Lawson Throws Kosta Karatzovalis Into the Cattle Stampede and Gets Grounded

(inspired by The Lion King)

At the village, Lawson, Gelman, Mundy and Skeens were feeling grumpy.

Lawson: God! That Kosta Karatzovalis whomps!

Gelman: Yeah, he's been so stupid!

Mundy: He's the worst leader of the Metal Punks ever!

Skeens: What shall we do, Lawson?

Then Lawson thought of something.

Lawson: I know guys! How about we take care of that idiot?

Gelman: That's a good idea! Let's go!

Lawson: I got the idea from the Lion King! First, I will take TJ Detweiler down to the gorge. Then we release the herd of cattle into the gorge. Attack the ill cow upon my signal, thus triggering the stampede. Then I will rush over to Kosta, Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus to come over to the gorge, and I'll get Kosta save TJ. He'll place TJ on a safe rock. When he climbs up the gorge to call for my help. Then I will throw him into the stampede. Come on, guys. Let's go and fetch TJ.

So Lawson, Gelman, Mundy and Skeens went off to fetch TJ Detweiler.

Lawson: Gelman, Mundy, Skeens, fetch Kosta, Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus while I take TJ to the gorge.

Gelman: Affirmative!

Lawson went off to TJ's house. Then Lawson arrived at TJ's house.

Lawson: Hi there, Detweiler!

TJ: Hi there yourself, Lawson! What's up?

Lawson: I'm taking you to the gorge so you can look around.

TJ: Oh boy! This is an exciting adventure! Let's go together!

So Lawson and TJ went off to the gorge. Later, they arrived down in the large canyon. Lawson and TJ were near a rock, underneath a small tree.

Lawson: Now you wait here. Kosta Karatzovalis has a marvelous surprise for you.

TJ: Oooh. What is it?

Lawson: If I told you, it wouldn't be a surprise, now would it?

TJ: If you tell me, I'll still act surprised.

Lawson: Ho ho ho. You are such a naughty boy.

TJ: Come on, Lawson.

Lawson: No-no-no-no-no-no-no. This is just for you and Kosta. You know, a sort of... Detweiler-Karatzovalis... thing.

Through TJ's expression, he resented Lawson's dismissive attitude, but soon shrugged it off.

Lawson: Well! I'd better go get him.

TJ: I'll go with you.

Lawson: (Loud, snapping tone) No! (regaining composure) Heh heh heh. No. Just stay on this rock. You wouldn't want to end up in another mess like you did with Chucko, Jocko, Koreo, Buster and Cheay...

TJ was shocked.

TJ: You know about that?

Lawson: TJ, everybody knows about that.

TJ was meek and embarrassed.

TJ: Really?

Lawson: Oh, yes. Lucky Kosta was there to save you, eh?

Lawson was clearly enjoying himself; he put a hand on TJ's shoulder.

Lawson: Oh... and just between us, you might want to sing 'This Old Man'. Hmm?

Lawson started to pull away.

TJ: Oh... Okay...

Lawson patted TJ roughly on the head, and then moved off.

TJ: Hey, Lawson, will I like the surprise?

Lawson: (Turning back over his shoulder) TJ, it's to DIE for.

Later at the cattle field, Gelman, Mundy and Skeens were waiting off at the edge of the cattle herd, hidden under a rock arch.

Gelman: Come on, Mundy and Skeens. Keep moving the herd, will you?

Mundy: Shut up, Gelman. We're doing it.

Skeens: Be patient, you idiot.

Gelman: That's it! That's it! Come on, you can do it!

Then Lawson came, and Gelman made an evil, almost humorous face.

Gelman: There he is. Let's go.

Lawson: Excellent, guys! Now attack the ill cow!

Gelman: Right!

Mundy: Let's beat that cow with sticks!

Skeens: Yeah, let's do it!

Gelman, Mundy and Skeens began to beat the ill cow with sticks in order to trigger the stampede. The cow was howling in pain. Meanwhile, back down the gorge. TJ began to sing 'This Old Man'.

TJ: ''This old man, he played one. He played knick-knack on my shoe; with a knick-knack paddywack, give the dog a bone. This old man came rolling down. ''

There came a low rumble. TJ looked down and saw pebbles jumping. A herd of cattle were coming over the lip of the gorge. TJ was terrified.

TJ: Oh no! This is terrible!

TJ felt angry, and waved his fist.

TJ: Lawson, you set me up!

Gelman, Mundy and Skeens were chasing the cattle herd, beating them with sticks to drive them over the edge.

At a short distance from the canyon. Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus were talking to Kosta Karatzovalis.

Vince: Oh look, Kosta. The herd is on the move.

Spinelli: Yes, they're running along.

Kosta Karatzovalis: Odd...

Lawson ran up, out of breath.

Lawson: Kosta. Quick. Stampede. In the gorge. TJ's down there!

Vince: TJ?

Gus: Oh no! TJ's going to be killed!

Gretchen: He'll be run over!

Mikey: Oh no! We'll lose TJ forever!

Back down the gorge, TJ kept on running, and then he climbed up a dead tree. Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus ran ahead of Kosta and Lawson, down into the canyon. They spotted TJ. TJ was clinging precariously to a tree.

TJ: Guys! Help me!!

Vince: Kosta is on the way! Hold on!

TJ was losing grip.

TJ: Hurry!

Kosta and Lawson were on the lower ledges of the gorge. Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus ran back to Kosta and pointed out where TJ was.

Spinelli: There! There! On that tree!

Kosta Karatzovalis: Hold on, TJ!

In the gully, a cow rammed the tree TJ was on, nearly breaking it.

TJ: Ahhhh!

Kosta ran out into the herd, joining the stampede. Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus were horrified.

Vince: Oh Lawson, this is awful.

Spinelli: What will we do? What will we do?

Gretchen: Hah... we'll go back for help, that's what we'll do.

Mikey: Yeah, TJ will be run over by that terrible stampede! What heartless fiends!

Gus: TJ will be dead! We'll go back for help! We'll tell our parents about that!

Lawson got annoyed.

Lawson: Oh shut up, you idiots! All of you whomp! Get out of here right now!

Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus fled in horror. Lawson followed Kosta's progress from the lip of the gorge, his shadow cast mysteriously from the bottom of the gully. Kosta ran with the herd till slightly past the tree. He whipped around the front of some cow and ran into the herd towards TJ's tree. He got rammed head-first once, throwing him to the ground. A cow hit TJ's tree, throwing TJ into the air.

TJ: Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh!

Kosta got up in time to catch TJ in the air with his arms.

Kosta Karatzovalis: No problem, TJ. I'll get you home to safety.

Kosta got hit again and accidentally threw TJ. TJ dodged a few oncoming cow. Kosta ran by with the herd and grabbed TJ. He jumped up to a near rock ledge and set TJ down, but was immediately struck by a cow and carried off into the stampede.

TJ: KOSTA!

TJ watched in horror as he couldn't find Kosta in the swirling mass of cow below him. At the last second, Kosta leaped out of the herd and started to climb with great difficulty up the sheer rock slope. TJ turned and started to climb up to the top of the gorge. Out of TJ's sight, Kosta reached a point right below a ledge where he couldn't climb due to the steepness. His fingers were scraping and his hands had no traction. Above him on the ledge was Lawson.

Kosta Karatzovalis: Lawson! Laws--

Kosta slipped and barely hanged on, and he begged Lawson to help him.

Kosta Karatzovalis: Lawson! Help me!

Lawson looked disdainfully down, and then suddenly latched onto Kosta's hands with fingernails extended. Kosta screamed, primarily from the sudden pain of Lawson's fingernails, but no doubt also due to the sudden flash of realization. His expression slowly changed to one of horror as he recognized Lawson's intent.

Lawson: Long live the king.

Lawson threw Kosta backwards. Kosta free-fell, back first into the stampede raging below.

Kosta Karatzovalis: Aaaaaaahh!

TJ was watching Kosta hit the ground. Kosta and TJ's screams mingled.

TJ: Noooooooooooooooooooo!

BUMP!

Kosta had hit the ground, and he was dead.

Lawson cheered.

Lawson: Yay! I threw him into the stampede! Yay! No more Kosta Karatzovalis! He's dead!

The herd passed. Everything was clouded by dust. TJ bounded to the canyon floor, and he started to look for Kosta. TJ coughed.

TJ: Kosta!!

TJ's voice echoed.

TJ: (Quietly) Kosta?

A stray cow ran past, the source of the sound. The cow curved around a log further down the gully. Under the log was Kosta, laying on his side. He was not moving or breathing. TJ approached the body, and he was hopeful.

TJ: Kosta? ...Kosta, come on.

TJ rubbed up against Kosta's cheek. The head merely rolled back in place after the rub.

TJ: You gotta get up.

TJ placed both hands on Kosta's cheek and pushed.

TJ: Kosta. I'll get you home.

TJ tugged at Kosta's leg. Again the head limply moved back in place. TJ ran off a bit, obviously very scared.

TJ: HEEEEELP! Somebody!

TJ's voice reverberates hollowly off the sides of the gorge.

TJ: Anybody... help.

TJ began to cry, and he turned back to the body. He nuzzled up under the limp paw so that Kosta was embracing him. Just then, Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus came.

Vince: Teej, what's wrong?

TJ: Oh, Vince. This is terrible. Kosta can't move.

Gus: Oh, this is a tragedy. A real tragedy. My dad's not going to be happy about this.

Gretchen: I know Gus, I know. I think Kosta's got a broken body.

Mikey: Oh no, Kosta's dead. This is terrible. Terrible!!! Waaaaaaaaaa!

Spinelli: Oh, don't cry, Mikey. Kosta's going to be alright.

Then Spinelli thought of something.

Spinelli: I think Kosta's not alright, we're going to cry now.

Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus started crying. Then Lawson advanced through the dust.

Lawson: TJ. What have you done?

TJ jumped back, and explained to Lawson.

TJ: There were cows and he tried to save me... it was an accident, I... I didn't mean for it to happen.

Spinelli: TJ didn't do anything.

Vince: It wasn't his fault.

Lawson embraced TJ, yet still distant.

Lawson: Of course, of course you didn't. No one... ever means for these things to happen. But Kosta Karatzovalis IS dead.

Mikey: No, no, it can't be. I can't believe Kosta's dead.

Lawson was looking with mock regret at TJ.

Lawson: And if it weren't for you, he'd still be alive.

TJ was crushed, believing his guilt. Aother thought "occured" to Lawson.

Lawson: Oh! All of you, guys. What will your parents think?

TJ and the Gang were still sobbing.

TJ: What are we gonna do?

Lawson: Run away, TJ. And you, Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey ansd Gus, run away. Run... Run away and never return.

TJ and the Gang ran off blindly, obviously broken. Then Gelman, Mundy and Skeens came.

Lawson: Guys, we did it! We took care of that Kosta Karatzovalis!

Gelman: Yeah, let's celebrate!

Mundy: Yeah, no more Kosta Karatzovalis! Hahahaha!

Skeens: I agree with Mundy, Kosta Karatzovalis is dead for good! The Metal Punks will be breaking up after losing their leader including Salli the Popstar. Salli lost her boyfriend now! Hahahahaha!

Lawson: Okay, guys! Let's play 'Kick the Corpse'!

Gelman: Good idea, let's do it!

Lawson, Gelman, Mundy and Skeens started kicking Kosta's dead body. Lawson was kicking Kosta's face, Gelman was kicking Kosta's broken body Mundy was kicking Kosta's head, and Skeens was kicking Kosta's bottom. Soon, they stopped kicking Kosta's dead body.

Lawson: Okay, guys. Let's let his dead body rot in the gorge forever. Let's go home.

So Lawson, Gelman, Mundy and Skeens went home. Back in Lawson's house, Lawson's dad was about to watch TV.

Lawson's dad: I am going to watch the news.

Then Lawson's dad turned on the TV to watch the news. The scene took place in the GNN News studio, Mort Chalk began to make an announcement.

Mort: This is Mort Chalk. Big Story News. Today was a terrible tragedy. A boy named Erwin Lawson and his friends Leo Gelman, Conrad Mundy and Greg Skeens had released the herd of cattle into the gorge, Gelman, Conrad and Greg attacked the ill cow upon Erwin's signal, thus triggering the stampede to chase TJ after Erwin left TJ down at the bottom of the gorge. Then Erwin got Kosta Karatzovalis and TJ's friends Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus to come over to the gorge, and he got Kosta to save TJ. Kosta placed TJ on a safe rock. Then he climbed up the gorge to call for Erwin's help. But Erwin had betrayed him, and threw him down the gorge where he fell in the stampede. Erwin was responsible for his death, much to TJ's dismay. Now everyone in Third Street School are going to mourn Kosta's death. Anyways, stay tuned because there are more commercials showing up. We will see you after the break.

Lawson's dad was furious.

Lawson's dad: What?! I can't believe that Erwin is responsible for Kosta's death! He's in so much trouble now! Graaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa! I want a word with him right now!

(We see Lawson's dad angry with a firey background surrounding him)

Lawson's dad: (Scary voice) Erwin, Erwin, Erwin, Erwin, Erwin, get over here right now!

At the lounge, Lawson's dad was furious with Lawson.

Lawson's dad: Erwin, how dare you throw Kosta Karatzovalis into the stampede?! Now everyone reacted to his death, thanks to you! Especially TJ and his friends, Miss Finster, Principal Prickly, Miss Grotke, other teachers and other students of Third Street School! Where did you get the idea from?

Lawson: Um, um, um... I got the idea from The Lion King where Scar throws Mufusa down the gorge. I took TJ Detweiler down to the gorge. Then I got Gelman, Mundy and Skeens to release the herd of cattle into the gorge and attack the ill cow upon my signal, thus triggering the stampede to chase TJ. Then I rushed over to Kosta, Vince, Spinelli, Gretchen, Mikey and Gus to come over to the gorge, and I got Kosta to save TJ. He placed TJ on a safe rock. Then he climbed up the gorge to call for my help, and I threw him down the gorge where he fell in the stampede. Then I told TJ and his friends to run away and never return so they won't go near Kosta ever again.

Lawson's dad: That was a very bad thing to do! TJ and his friends are crying about Kosta's death, because of you! That's it, you are grounded, grounded grounded until you watched The Lion King! Perhaps it will teach you not throw anyone into the stampedge like Scar did to Mufusa! Instead of going to your room, start watching The Lion King right now!

Lawson did as he was told.

Lawson: Whatever you say, dad.

CAST

Eric as Lawson, Mundy and TJ Detweiler

Joey as Gelman amd Mikey Blumberg

Brian as Skeens

Paul as Vince LaSSao

Julie as Spinelli

Amy as Gretchen Grundler

Evil Genius/David/Zack as Gus Griswald

Russell as Kosta Karatzovalis

Wiseguy as Mr Lawson (Lawson's dad)

Dallas as Mort Chalk