Excuse Me

Transcript
(Eric is calling the dentist's office to schedule an appointment)

Voice on phone: Hello. This is Dr. Jones's office calling to remind you of your dental cleaning tomorrow.

Eric: Can't make it.

Voice on phone: May I ask why?

Eric: I don't like it when people offend me with unprofessional and inappropriate language.

Voice on phone: I didn't use inappropriate language.

Eric: Okay, then the car won't start.

Voice on phone: But you live a block away. Why can't you just walk?

Eric: Well, both of my feet are broken.

Voice on phone: Okay, we'll send a cab.

Eric: A cab? I can't afford it.

Voice on phone: We'll pay.

Eric: Uh, my mother died.

Voice on phone: You said that last year.

Eric: Uh, okay, uh, my father died this time.

Voice on phone: You don't know which of your parents died?

Eric: It's hard to keep track.

Voice on phone: Of your parents?

Eric: No, when you're training for a marathon.

Voice on phone: On two broken feet?!

Eric: I don't run. I drive the course.

Voice on phone: But your car won't start!

Eric: Okay, I'll take a cab.

Voice on phone: But you said you've got no money!

Eric: Yeah, and Mom died again.

(By now, the voice on the phone can't take it anymore)

Voice on phone: Either you give me a valid excuse or get your stupid rear in here!!!

Eric: Like I said, I don't like it when people offend me with inappropriate language.

(Eric turns off his phone)

Eric: So unprofessional.