Barney Fever

The following fanfic will be based on an episode of Recess called, "Bonky Fever" Coming soon to a Weasel Board near you!

PS: Studio K/CBC Kids (c) CBC-TV Canada Recess (c) Disney

"Parney Fever"

Written and Directed by: Carly Watt

Starring: Jason Hopley - Gary Ali Eisner - Mamma Kira Hall - Cottonball Todd Doldersum - Mr. Orlando Frank Meschkuleit - Putter Joey Mazzarino - Makeup Monster Alyson Court Michael Clark Patty Sullivan Sid Bobb Tony Kim Janaye Upshaw Victor Vertibsky

(Sid draws the number 12) Sid: Can't you believe it, Gary's turning the big 1-2! Michael: When I turned 12 my dad butted me out to the next lounge Patty: When I turned 12, I stayed up till 8:30 on Tuesday nights. It was just me, the TV, Mr Dressup, and Mister Rogers' Neighborhood! Alyson: I wonder what the Garster's gonna do! Cottonball: Let's ask him! (Gary enters) Makeup: Hey Gary! How's it going? Mamma Yamma: You must be getting excited about the big day Gary? Mr. Orlando: Yo Gary, you OK? You look like you just lost your best fruit pie. Gary: Oh yeah! Fruit Pie! (Gary, Mr. Orlando, and Sid see a bunch of kids running) Gary: Hey, somebody dropped their sippy cup! (He picks up the sippy cup, and sees a familiar face on it) Gary: Parney! Hello old friend! (Parney's theme song plays while Gary looks at the sippy cup) Parney, Parney, speckled little dinosaur. Parney, Parney

It's about time for some Studio K!

(We see the Humans and Gary with Putter) Patty: Hey Guys! It's Patty, Sid, Victor, Alyson, Gary, and... Victor: Drumroll please! Putter: Putter! Sid: And now it's time for our favorite time of day... All: The Question Machine! Alyson: And that's where you send in your questions to Studio K for us to answer. Patty: And now it's time for us to... All: Fire up the Question Machine! Putter: Mindy asks "What Juice will Gary be having at his party?" Gary: Hmm, I think we're having apple! Victor: He thinks we're having apple? Alyson: That's weird! Victor: Just last week Gary couldn't wait to turn 12, now he doesn't care what juice we're having at his party! Sid: Yeah, ever since yesterday he's been acting funny! Patty: That tends to happen as people begin to age. They fail them, their brains are not what they used to be. Sid: We've known Gary our whole lives, and there's nothing wrong with that unicorn! Alyson: Remember, If you have a question to send in, then please go to cbc.ca/kidscbc2

(Cut to Tony, Janaye, Michael, Mamma Yamma, Gary, and Cottonball) Tony: Come on Michael, do your worst! I'm right here! I'm afraid of no kickball! (Janaye throws the ball to Michael, who kicks it) Tony: OK, major point! Michael: Gary, heads up! (The Ball then falls on Gary, who also falls down) Tony: Gary, I told you, never turn your back when Janaye is- (He doesn't get to finish, because Gary stands up with a blue mouth) (The Humans, Mamma, and Cottonball gasp) Michael: Gary, your face is blue! Gary: I fell, in a puddle. Uh, blueberries! (Gary quits) Gary: I gotta go clean up! Tony: A puddle of blueberries? (Victor enters, and holds up a popsicle shaped like a certain dinosaur) Victor: Uh guys, I don't know how to say this, but Gary wasn't eating blueberries! He was - sucking on a Parney Pop! (Mamma snatches the popsicle) Mamma Yamma: A Parney Pop? But they're for kindergarteners? Tony: Yeah, and that's not all! Cottonball: Look! (Tony and Cottonball open Gary's backpack, which is packed with heaps of Parney merchandise!) Janaye: Parney stuff? But Why? Mamma Yamma: Is it obvious? We've all gone through a Parney phase, usually at age 2 or 3, or maybe you turn 5. Still, to a Parney obsession at the age of 12, this is very serious! Tony: All I can say is that I didn't like Parney when I was supposed to when I don't like him now! (Janaye picks up a yellow Parney ball) Janaye: Yeah, and besides we can't hang out with a 12 year old Parney freak! We've got laughing stuff in Studio K! Michael: But guys, this is Gary we're talking about! The Garster, The Garinator, Big Unicorn, Our friend. We can't just give up on him, he needs us! Mamma Yamma: But what could we do! Tony: We could just take all this Parney junk and throw it down a ravine! Michael: No! I have an idea - Face to Face Confrontation. We just go to Gary, look him right in the eye, and tell him we know all of his Parney stuff! He'll be so embarrassed, he'll stop playing with Parney! Just like that! Just like that, you'll see.

Cottonball: Hi! I'm dressed as Bookaboo, because we both love music and books, and we both love Rock and Roll Rhymes! With my special guest! (Sid enters, dressed as Frank Sinatra) Sid: Hi Cottonball! Cottonball: Oh dear, I thought we were supposed to dress as the greatest rock star of all time! Sid: Who is it? Cottonball: Bookaboo! Sid: OH!!! You're right, he is the greatest! I should have thought about that! Cottonball: Oh yeah, Great! I love your clothes! Sid: Huh, you like it? Cottonball: I do! So, Sid, what do you want to sing today? Sid: How about some sweet Croonin'? Cottonball: OK, let's do it? Sid: Cue da Music! (A Sinatra version of John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt plays) Sid and Cottonball: John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt His name is our names too Whenever I go out The people always shout John, Jacob 'heimer Schmidt! John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt His name is our names too Whenever I go out The people always shout John, Jacob 'heimer Schmidt! oh-oh-oh-oh-oh La La La La La Cottonball: So Fun! Wow! Sid: Yup, even though it was slow!

Michael and Alyson: It's 7-second Sumo! Michael: We've got 7 seconds Alyson: To put our toys away in this box Both: Let's do it! (They sort their toys in their toy box, while on-screen numbers appear) People: 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1! (Michael faints on the toy box) Alyson: Are you OK? Michael: Yeah! I'm Good!

(We see the Humans running to Gary, who is building a Parney sandcastle) Michael: Hey Gary, you forgot your backpack! (Gary sits on the sandcastle, destroying it) Gary: Oh, Thanks! Michael: The Dinosaur's out of the bag! We know you're all hooked up on Parney Gary: I'm quite sure I don't know what you're talking about! Janaye: Come on man, your backpack's jammed with Parney junk! I mean, that's gotta be a cry for help! Gary: That's not Parney junk, it's - (He doesn't get a chance to finish) Gary: OK it is, but it was put there by someone else! Out to get me! Victor: Please, Gary! Get off that stuff! Gary: Never! (He runs away) Michael: Gary, wait! (Gary slips on marbles and falls down, causing all his "Parney Junk" (as it's called by the Humans) to fall out of his backpack) Boy: Hey look everybody, Gary the Unicorn's playing with Parney stuff! (Cut to kids laughing) Kids (singing): Gary loves Parney, Gary loves Parney! Gary: You've just gotta be quiet! (Gary runs away, while the Humans run to him) (A Parney doll falls, and Michael picks it up) Michael: Maybe confronting him wasn't the best thing to do after all!

Gary: It's time for Gary's Hug Club! Yay! (Cut to Gary with Andy Day) Gary: Aloha everybody! Standing here right next to me is super duper CBeebies guy Andy Day! Andy: Hello Gary! I'm great, how are you? Gary: Excited, how's your day? Andy: All around nice! Gary: Great! Now, do you want to be in my Hug Club? Andy: Yes. Well, my hug is the Jumping Hug (More coming soon!!!) Studio K plot outline - Parney fever by cbeebiesfan

(Cut to Gary sitting alone with his backpack, the Humans staring at him) Victor: Poor Gary! We better do something! Patty: I suggest we try acceptance! Janaye: Acceptance? Tony: You gotta be kidding? Patty: Listen, if we support Gary by supporting his new lifestyle, perhaps to help build his self-esteem (Michael looks at Patty with a face) Michael: Well, I guess it's worth a try! (Michael sighs, and he and the other Humans walk up to Gary) Michael: Hey Gary, sorry what happened earlier. Here, you dropped something! (The Humans hand Gary his Parney doll) Gary: Parney! Tony: Ain't he the cutest? (A ball falls on Gary, who cries like a baby. Tony hands him a Parney blankie) Tony: Uh, here you go mam! (Mamma, Cottonball, Mr. Orlando, and Makeup stare in peer) Mamma Yamma: A Parney blankie? That went out like 6 years ago! (The commissary lady puts Gary's food on his tray) Gary: Excuse me, may I have some pudding? Not for me, but for Parney! (He holds up his Parney puppet) Gary: (in a Parney voice) Parney luvs pudding! Commissary Lady: No seconds on dessert! Bye Bye, Parney! (Gary throws a tantrum) Parney want Pudding! Parney want Pudding! (Janaye enters) Janaye: Here Parney, you can have mine! Gary: Thank you Janaye! Parney luv Janaye! (The Humans play kickball) Gary: Michael, can you lend me and Parney to the bathroom in Studio K? We need to go! Michael: You what? Time out! (We see the Humans - Michael, Patty, Alyson, Victor, Janaye, Tony, and Sid, putting their heads together) Sid: OK, confrontation didn't work, and acceptance didn't work. Michael: Tony, you're right! Alyson: And so that means the only solution left is to... Patty and Tony: Get Him! Gary: Huh? What's going on! (The Humans attack Gary) Gary: That tickles! Janaye: This is for your own good man! Victor: Please don't hit me for this, Gary! Patty: It doesn't kill you, it makes you stronger! (Michael takes away Gary's backpack) Gary: Parney! No! Parnieeeeeeeeeeeeeee! (Michael walks up to Mamma) Michael: Mamma... Mamma Yamma: What is it Michael? (Michael looks at the Humans and hands Mamma Gary's backpack) Michael: Parney stuff, mam! I found it in the Green Room! Mamma Mamma: Little Toys from Homer strictly forbidden! Michael: Yeah, and I thought you should bonk him up! (Cut to Gary crying, and Michael walking up to him and the other Humans) Michael: I'm sorry Gary, but I found no other way! Patty: Now your recovery can't begin! Tony: Doesn't it feel good to get that Dinosaur off your back? Gary: Yeah, you guys are right! It was for my own good! I shouldn't be playing with little kid stuff. And heck, in a few days I'm gonna be the big 1-2, right? Tony and Alyson: Exactly! Gary: Well, I better get back to the Green Room! (Janaye looks happily at Patty and Sid) Janaye: Well, I believe the Parney nightmare is finally over!

Michael (voiceover): Live! from Studio K, where the flavor of the day is delicious, it's time to play the Tasting Game! (to Cottonball) Cottonball, it's time to find your perfect snack match! Let's meet the ingredients behind the curtains! (We see Alyson walking in as an apple and Patty walking in as an orange) Patty and Alyson: Hi! Cottonball: OK, let's see! Um, ingredient #1, do you say you're always happy? Patty: Well, Yes! I would say I'm happy all the time! I hang out with every ingredient I know! I play dodgeball with meatballs! And I wanna be a vlogger someday! (More coming soon!!!)

(We see the Humans and the Puppets walking to Gary's house with their presents for his 12th birthday party) Tony: Everyone ready to honor our old friend Gary the Unicorn? Janaye: Our 12 year old friend Gary! Makeup: I got him a lazer beam! Cottonball: I'm paying tribute with a pogo stick! Mamma Yamma: Linda, Lord of Destruction! Makeup, Cottonball, Sid, Patty, Alyson, Tony, Victor, Janaye, and Michael: Wow! (They walk to the door) Victor: This is gonna rock! (They ding the doorbell, and see kids running) Patty: What are the kindergarteners doing here? Sid: You don't think!

(A paper airplane zooms by as we pan across a crowded classroom full of monsters (among them are Mr. Thunder and Yum-Yum), over to Mr. Orlando, talking to the sound operator. Chocolate Monster sits behind Mr. Orlando, looking around anxiously and biting his nails.) (to sound operator) Uh, no ... mostly, uh, I think, like, I think I got mostly C-minuses, you know. I-I was sort of a late bloomer. What? (He notices he's on camera.) Makeup: Security Moose, and I'm speaking to you from inside a typical classroom on the first day of school. And what an exciting day it is for all these students as they look forward to another wonderful school year. (He gets out of his chair and walks around.) Mr. Orlando: Let's see if we can talk to some of the happy students before the teacher arrives. (More coming soon!!!) Parney fever! by cbeebiesfan

(We see the Humans and the Puppets walking to the door, and gasping - seeing that Gary's 12th birthday party is completely Parney themed; with a Parney piñata, a Parney cake, and Pin the Tail on Parney) Cottonball: Tell me I'm not seeing this! Gary: Hey Afecterinos, join the party, we love Parney! (Gary's mom walks in) Gary's mom: Oh my goodness boys and girls, guess who's here? (The Parney theme song plays) Parney, Parney, speckled little dinosaur Victor: Oh No! (None other than Parney himself dances into the living room) Parney, Parney Kids: Parney! Parney: Yup Yup Yup Hidey Hi There Kiddly Widdlies it's Parney time! (Parney and the kids dance around in a circle) Makeup: Oh man! Gary's pulled out the Parney wagon! Patty: We've gotta destroy his Parney obsession once and for all! Tony: Are you guys thinking what I'm thinking? Janaye: I see no other way! Alyson: Fan out! (The Puppets and the Humans run to Parney) Sid: Now! (Parney falls down) Michael: You think this is Parney? I'll show you Parney! (Michael takes Parney's head off, revealing Mr. Orlando's inside the costume!) (Gary and the Kids gasp) Mamma Yamma: Mr. Orlando? Mr. Orlando: Oh, hi there kids! Gary: One of my friends is Parney? My head hurts! (Gary runs away)